Nasa keeps announcing my dream job – and I might never get it. Asked many years ago what my dream job was I replied: "Mattress testing by lying on one through the whole day." And now Nasa is paying people (not me necessarily) a tidy sum to lie on beds (at a six-degree tilt, and possibly face down, but one gets used to such things) for a little over two months. What was once considered goofing off has now been elevated to a scientific experiment.
Imagine how good that will look on your CV for your next job. "Worked with Nasa". That’s all you need to reveal. The art of CV-writing lies in what you leave out, not what you put in. Unless what you put in is unexpected. For instance, I had an artist friend who wrote that his work was in the Museum of Modern Art in New York. This was literally true, but not in the way you might imagine. He made a small clay model of something or the other (I think it was the other) and hid it under one of the benches outside. His work was indeed in the MoMA. He then used the same technique to boast that his work was at the Louvre, Prado and his neighbourhood gallery.
Anyway, back to Nasa. "I slept through 70 days" is not likely to excite an interviewer who wants to know what you bring to his company or where you see yourself in five years’ time (the standard questions at these soirees, I am told).
Perhaps you can volunteer the information that you handled machinery that came pre-tilted, in order to study the effect of something on something else. That is a lovely word, ‘pre-tilted’. It suggests gravitas and makes the whole thing sound as if mankind might not survive if you didn’t use machinery that was pre-tilted at Nasa.
The one condition that Nasa imposes is this: "Those selected can spend their time doing anything they want — surfing the internet, reading, even working remotely if their job lets them — so long as they don’t get out of bed." This sounds exactly like the conditions I work in on a daily basis. Except that the Lazyboy chair I work out is tilted at more than six degrees, but in other respects, I probably have the most experience among those applying for the job that will earn the applicant some $20,000. I came pre-tilted into this world, continue to exist mostly pre-tilted, and will doubtless pass on pre-tilted.
And I do all of the above, surf the internet, read, work remotely (and sometimes remotely work), so I should feel right at home.
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