I just read a story claiming that making your bed every day can create a health hazard. It seems a made bed has the potential to create a humid environment welcoming to bedbugs.
One expert said a made bed could breed bedbugs, another expert argued that it made no difference.
Despite their lack of a clear conclusion, after finishing the article, I had drawn a clear conclusion of my own — make sure the husband never sees the article.
The goal of marriage is to blend two separate lives into one harmonious existence. It is a process that takes time. Once you have such a system working — the toilet paper goes over the roll, not under — the last thing you want is some article undermining your system.
It takes some couples years of negotiations to reach the delicate compromises that keep a relationship healthy — squeeze the toothpaste from the bottom, don’t scrunch it in the middle.
There is simply some ground that, once firm, you don’t want to turn over a second time — make a grocery list, don’t just walk around the store and see what looks good.
You may know who you are as individuals entering the marriage, but then comes the challenge of discovering who you are as a couple — hotel people with a Starbucks on site or outback wilderness campers?
You work your way through things like whether the expiration date on food is to be taken seriously or merely a suggestion.
Then there are the matters of housekeeping. Do dirty clothes go in the laundry basket or simply in the general vicinity of the laundry basket?
And making the bed. The husband was not a make-the-bed guy when we married. I was of the belief that you can’t have a successful day if you leave the bedroom without first making the bed.
Our compromise was that the last one out of the bed would be the one to make it. This system worked fine in our early years as his work day stated at 5.30am and he left the house before I was awake. I made the bed.
Even when he worked more traditional hours, I continued to make the bed. I was happy to and he was happy that I was happy.
Several years ago, our schedules changed. I am now the first one up and so he has been making the bed. Routinely. Every day. No questions asked.
It’s a new system and I like the new system. I really, really like the new system. I’m not about to let a vague threat of bedbugs ruin it now. I’m afraid if he saw the article he would try to renegotiate terms on making the bed.
I’m not hiding the facts; I’m protecting our marriage.
One of our daughters just called to say that after 10 years of marriage her husband has suddenly decided the right way to load silverware in the dishwasher is with the utensil handles up, not down.
Just when you think you know a person.
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